Newest things overheard
[557] Lube???
- 'Are you sure you have enough lube? we have over 50 people coming.'
[556] Five-year-old boy
- Five-year-old boy: There are moles in my bed that are all named Leroy. They keep me warm.
[555] Remember
- Boyfriend: Remember when you used to love me?
Girlfriend: Yeah...
Boyfriend: That was nice.
[554] Barefoot From Now On
- Homeless Man to Very Well Dressed Corporate Executive: You can't wear those fancy shoes no more. You gotta take 'em off rihgt away.
The executive ignores him
Homeless Man: I tell you - those Gucci shoes you got on. They gotta come off your feet. Your socks too. Ask me why..
Executive: (exasperated) They're Ferragamo, not Gucci. I'm not ...
[549] Chicken Plate
- I was about to go home from work (@ a japanese food place), when a phone call came, This woman asked the worker, "what comes on a chicken plate." (our store phone is pretty loud) Then this worker told her
"Chicken................(like seriously 5 second pause)... OH! and rice"
I almost died from trying not to laugh....
a...
[548] Brother
- I was walking out of my dorm room to the bathroom down the hall and I walk past this girls room that has the door cracked just as she yells:
"I'm serious! Get out of my room. If you can have sex with her, you can have sex with me!"
There was a pause and someone else says "but he's you're brother?"
[547] Not so discreet
- My sister and I were sitting near a married couple and their young daughter at the mall when a gay couple passed. The amused wife said quietly to her husband, "Look at the G--A--Y men." (spelling so their daughter wouldn't understand) Right away their daughter asked very loudly, "What's a G--A--Y man?" Several people looke...
[546] Magical Crystals
- I was in a museum gift shop in Santa Fe and overheard a lady telling her husband "Honey, look at this crystal, this would be good to get rid of the bad vibes of the computer"
[544] Small Penis
- While walking to the campus diner, a group of guys were walking behind me. One of them said, "I have a small penis. Well, it's not small, it's just thin. Like a pencil."
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