All things overheard
[529] I'm Not Sure
- Band Director talking to a group of a few students: Maybe it was a transgender frog"
[528] Professor
- Professor: We need this paper to be huge! I want people to fear us when we go to meetings... We need to be like male elephants!
Grad student #1: You want me to grow tusks?
Grad student #2: You want me to grow big ears?
Professor: No! We need to...
[527] Old Woman and Man
- Old Woman:Did you see what happened last night?
Old man:What happened?
Old woman:Someone pushed me in a pole and i broke my finger,Doesn't that bother you that there are so many people that get hurt by bad people?
Old man:No because im th...
[526] Dumb Teens
- Teen girl #1: Oh my god! Really? Well, even though you're three weeks late, you totally don't have to worry until a month after you guys actually did it. So you've definitely got at least a week left until you need to start worrying.
Teen girl #2...
[525] Good Breakfast
- Spaced-out case manager helping client apply for Social Security: So this question here asks you to describe your daily routine in the morning. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up? Brush your teeth?
Client: I ain’t got no teeth. I smok...
[524] Tourists
- Bimbette #1: God, people in Midtown are sooo ugly.
Bimbette #2: Yeah, I know.
Bimbette #1: It's probably because, like, 85 percent are tourists.
Bimbette #2: Oh my god, I know! Tourists are so ugly.
[520] cupcakes
- Woman: I want one of those cupcakes with no sprinkles.
Cashier: They all have sprinkles, ma'am.
Woman: [lingers, looks] I thought some didn't.
Cashier: They all do.
Woman: ... I thought some didn't.
Cashier: No, all the cupcakes hav...
[519] Blaming
- Female intern: I'm not sorry.
Male worker: You should be. I missed my deadline.
Female intern: You missed your deadline because you are hungover, like, every day.
Male worker: Compounded by the fact I have to mentor skanks at work!
[518] bras
- Peon #1: Did you hear they're thinking about banning all gel-enhanced bras on airplanes?
Peon #2: Women wear gel in their bras?
Peon #1: It's like padding, but gel, which gives it a more natural enhancement and feel.
Peon #2: That's false adver...
[517] all-water diet
- Cheerleader #1: Girl, are you still on that all-water diet?
Cheerleader #2: Mmhmm.
Cheerleader #1: Girl, you better watch, you’re gonna die from that shit.
Cheerleader #2: It don’t matter if I’m dyin’ skinny.